Daddy

Dear Daddy-

I know that it's been two years since I last saw you. It seems like a long time. I know that we'll be together again soon...it might just take a few more years before it happens.

I miss riding in the car to work with you every morning, listening to Glenn Beck through the snowstorms, or the sunrise. Thanks for not hating me when I took those classes at 7am, which meant that you had to go to work at 6:30. Thanks for letting me use your printer to print off my papers that were due in less than an hour.....

I miss waiting for you to pick me up from work and listening to whoever the political talk show guys were that we listened to. I don't listen to them anymore because I'm not even sure what station was on.

I miss complaining about school to you and having you tell me how bad it was for you. I was kind of shocked when you told me that you got a C in one of your accounting classes. I think that you told me you failed a class once. It was silly, but it helped me get some perspective. I'll have you know that I haven't failed a class....yet....I hope you'll be proud.

I miss going to see the new, cool movies with you. I think that you would have like How to Train Your Dragon, Despicable Me and Tron. I miss you gagging at princess movies. I think you would have enjoyed Tangled.

I miss waking up early in the morning to find that you were already up and reading your scriptures. I know that you are a quiet, private kind of guy, but I'm glad that you read in the living room. Having your scriptures means so much more to me than it could have if I hadn't caught you reading.

I miss having somebody to squish my spiders. Though now I won't squish any crawling thing. I pretend that its because I don't want to kill them...but really, you were the only one who could squish spiders.

I miss having someone to eat the burned cookies and tell me that they are delicious, and then get in a fake argument with mom because she likes them uncooked. Sometimes I want to burn an entire batch of cookies just for you. You know that no one else would eat them if I did. Mom would pretend to be furious. Then I would make another double batch and undercook them. And the quadruple batch of cookies would be gone before the weekend was over.

I miss you eating your cereal out of a red, plastic cup.

I miss always having ice cream in the freezer. Not the strawberry stuff. Yuck. No one did like that kind. But I guess that's why you bought it. No one else would eat it.

I miss the smell of starch as mom ironed your shirts for work. The whole house would smell like it. I'm not sure that you knew that, because she hardly ironed while you were there.

I miss going to the temple with you. I'm glad that you took time out of your busy schedule to come do baptisms with us.

I miss you laughing.

I miss you crying.

I miss you snoring.

I miss you.

It won't be long now...I'll see you again soon.

Love from your daughter,

Anne.

P.S. Please ask Jesus when He is coming. I'm getting a little anxious.

What I've Learned...April 2010-April 2011

First of all, my apologies for not writing for 3 months...or so...I am a student, and blogging hasn't really been on my priority list. But, it will be now, because finals are coming and I need a new way to procrastinate!

Anyways....

I try to write a "What I've Learned" list every year. A good friend of mine suggested it to me when life was getting me down. She helped me to see that I had been progressing, and that the Lord had been teaching me all along the way. It helped me gain the perspective that I needed to help me through that difficult circumstance.

What I've Learned: April 2010-2011

I've learned....

• That I should constantly be looking beyond the mask that people put up to hide who they are or how they feel. "In the quiet heart is hidden, Sorrow that the eye can't see" (LDS Hymns #219, Because I have Been Given Much)
  
• To care so much for others that I feel sad about missing an opportunity to serve them.
  
• That when you do your very best, the Lord takes care of the rest.
  
• To love with all of my heart "Better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all"
• To be completely honest with everyone around me, my family, my roommates, my friends, my date, strangers, leaders etc.
  
• The Lord uses death as a tool for our spiritual growth
• To not be afraid (I'm not sure if I've finished learning this though...)
• An iPod touch is probably the best invention ever. Besides a Blentech blender. The only thing better than both of those in an iPhone
• I need more than 6 hours of sleep every night.
• Saying goodbye is hard.
• Compassion is an important attribute to have. Everyone has struggles and weaknesses and just because it seems like yours are easier doesn't make you better than them.
• Flame throwers make great substitute matches.
• When I'm having a bad day I buy pizza or ice cream. When I'm having a HORRIFIC day I buy both.
• Exercising every day makes you stronger. That's kind of a no brainer...but I have a testimony of it now.
• Tri-folded wedding announcements look amazing.
• One can survive with only 3 pairs of shoes.
• The Lord will help you heal, sometimes immediately, sometimes later, and sometimes not in this life. It doesn't matter which way it happens, just remember that it always will.
• Country music is therapeutic.
• Mopping the floor on your hands and knees is a productive way to procrastinate paper writing.
• Eating healthy makes you and your body happy.
• You can put everything on an iPod touch, papers for class, books, LDS Institute manuals, pictures, music.....
• There is literally an app for everything. Except a build-your-own-molecule app. Maybe I'll create it. Or suggest it to someone smarter than me.
• Whole grains taste better.
• Doing homework in the living room while your roommate is playing video games=being very, very distracted.

There's probably a lot more. But that's all that I can think of right now. :D

Gumbo

So today I looked into my fridge, and my pantry, and wasn't hungry for anything in either of those.

So I was flipping through my Fannie Farmer cook book looking for something...anything!...that looked appetizing. I saw stuffed bell peppers....but it would take 45 minutes to bake. So that was a no go.

Then. I saw. IT.

A Gumbo recipe.

And that sounded good.

So, I searched online for vegan recipes (remember, I'm trying to be better about what I eat). Besides, I didn't want to buy shrimp, or chicken. And I found a few. I pieced together my own recipe. The only thing lamentable is that I didn't have any okra in the house. Oh well. So here's my recipe for Gumbo!

~Gumbo~
Prep Time: 1 hour (with rice)

2 tbsp olive oil
2 tbsp whole wheat flour
6 cups vegetable broth (or two vegetable bouillon in 6 cups of water)

3 stalks of celery, diced or chopped
1 onion, diced or chopped
1 bell pepper, diced or chopped
2 tomatoes, diced or chopped
3 cloves of garlic, diced

1 cup cooked whole grain rice

3 dashes of red pepper flakes (I think I may have put in 6....which would explain why it was so spicy)
2 dashes of black pepper
2 dashes of Oregano

*If you don't have any cooked rice on hand, go ahead and start this recipe by cooking a cup of rice. You want to undercook the rice, just a little bit, so that it won't go squishy when added to the gumbo pot.
*While your rice is cooking, go ahead and chop up your vegetables.

Heat stove top to medium heat and place large pot on top. Pour olive oil in pot and let it heat for about a minute. Add flour and stir. Heat these together for a few minutes (technically you should make a roux out of it, and it should cook for hours, but I burn mine so easily that I gave up). Add vegetable broth and all the vegetables. Let this heat up till it is steaming, then go ahead and add the spices. The more red pepper flakes you use, the spicier it will be! let boil until vegetables become softer...and add the rice. Turn down to a simmer for around 10-15 minutes. You should have a nice pot of gumbo!!!

I didn't technically time any of this....or exactly measure anything. But, I must say it's pretty close :D

ENJOY!

A Lesson Learned

Today the Lord taught me an important lesson. The lesson of listening. And the lesson of loving, even when one has been injured by another. I wish I could give specifics, but that would reveal much more than I would intend.

Suffice it to say, that someone had been unkind to me. And I was angry at them for the unkindnesses. I went to talk to them about it, to confront them, to exact of them what was rightfully mine. It would feel good to show them that they were in the wrong, I thought. I had a list of all the charges against them in my head, ready to spring them out. But yet I still prayed that God would help me say and do the right thing. I'm not sure that I realized how against God I was going by being angry. But I felt justified.

I walked in, and it was almost as if....I was a little speechless.

"Hey...how are things going?" I managed to get out.

The person's usual response followed:

"Oh life is drama, and stress...you know."

I didn't know what else to say...the anger was still simmering...but not boiling over like it had before.

"Umm...someone said that you had ___ for me?" I said, trying not to..well, who knows what I was trying to do.

My purpose was to come and get what was owed. I could stick to that purpose.

"Oh. Yeah. Let me see if I have it."

As I waited I felt the anger slip away. I cared more for this person than for what she owed me. All of the sudden, it didn't seem as important as making sure that she knew how much I cared about her. And I was disappointed in myself for having lost sight of that.

"Here you go."

"Thanks" was all I managed to say.

A silence followed as she went back to her work.

"Umm...how are things really going? You're moving back to ____ right?"

"Yeah. It's so much drama right now. You would not believe how much drama."

And she sounded so disheartened. It was heartbreaking to me. Whatever resentment I had had...was gone. I had forgotten to see her as a beloved child of a Heavenly Parent, Someone who loved her more than I could. I had let that escape me as I had traveled with anger to speak to her. It doesn't matter what she had done, I was more in the wrong for neglecting one of the greatest commandments: Love thy neighbor as thyself.

"That's the toughest, isn't it? Life is okay to handle, but drama...drama you can't control. I've always been impressed with your ability to handle life. Drama is hard...but I'm sure you can make it."

"Do you need any help?" I offered, seeing her struggling with the task at hand.

"Oh, really? I'm going to load these things in about 5 minutes. That would be great."

As I helped, I repented quite profusely. A sweet spirit overcame me as I let the beautiful truths sink into my soul. She is my sister. And I am serving her because I love her.

She thanked me so sincerely, I was unsure what to say. I've never seen her be that sincere before. And she meant every thank you. I left her, knowing that she would never have a cause to say that I had been unkind to her. That means a lot to me.

And I was grateful to the Lord for helping me to curb the natural woman within me, to nip my anger in the bud, and to remember the most important truth, that He had had my mother teach me so long ago:

People are more important than things.