Modesty for Guys

This summer at EFY I had the great pleasure of co-teaching about the For Strength of Youth Standard of Dress and Appearance. It is so important for young men and young women to understand that being "modest" is something that the Lord asks us to do because the way that we dress and act is a reflection of who we are on the inside. It is critical for young women AND young men to realize that their dress and appearance choices can have a profoundly negative effect on those around them.

As part of the lesson, my co-teacher passed out pieces of paper to have youth of both genders write down their thoughts about the OPPOSITE gender when they are immodest. I came across the responses from the young women about the young men, and wanted to preserve them. So here's the list!

"Must be a jerk & treat girls like crap."

"Very uncomfortable.. PULL THOSE PANTS UP BOYS! No one wants to see the color of your boxers, shave those beards and cut your hair! If you don't, it just makes you look like a homeless person."

"I think they're just being disrespectful to us and it's just gross."

"I don't want to be around them."

"It makes me feel awkward and I wish that they would have more respect for themselves."

"I look away, it's awkward, I'm afraid...Something awkward will happen to guys wearing baggy pants."

"I think they look trashy and they look like druggies that have no standards."

"It makes me feel really uncomfortable when guys are 'immodest' or are showing too much, and it makes me want to yell something like 'Pull your pants up, no one wants to see your underwear' or 'Put some CLOTHES on!'"

"PULL UP YOUR PANTS! No one cares what color or pattern your boxers are .I would rather date a clean-cut guy than a guy with dirty, white tank top to see his muscles. Also, not wearing a shirt we can see your abs. WE DON'T CARE! If I can see your bajillion abs, you're probably a show-off that's not worth it. Also, most of us are not Bliebers or hippies, so keep your hair short. You're a guy, not a girl."

"It makes me feel really uncomfortable when I am around them and it sneds a bad message to my brain and its really hard to focus on the Spirit or on good things."

"If you don't take care of yourself then how are you going to treat your wife?"

"When a young man is immodest I feel like they are not honoring their priesthood. It makes it hard for me to respect the power they have."

"Honestly.. I feel slightly scared sometimes. I mean I don't fee secure and good anymore. Men w/ extreme hair and piercings gross me out! And I don't get what message they're trying to send by dressing that and looking that way because it just yells trash to me!"

"It makes me feel like he isn't someone who could take me to the temple. Basically, it's disgusting. Act like a royal son of God that you are."

"When guys dress immodest, it makes me think, is that how you'll treat me...sloppy?"

Preparing for Shabbat

With all of the new coverage of the end of the world happening tomorrow, I started thinking about the Second Coming of the Savior. I posted a scripture on my facebook page that follows:

"Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh." -Matthew 25:13

We do not know when the Lord will come. We cannot know the day, or the hour. And why? Because the Lord has said that we will not. Good enough for me.

I think it would is wise to watch for His coming, and to observe the signs of His coming. It is also wise to be prepared for His coming, whether it is tomorrow or in twenty years. We need to be doing all that is in our power to prepare ourselves for His coming.

Today I was reading about the preparation for Shabbat, or Jewish Sabbath. There is a preparation time for the Sabbath, because there are many things that cannot be done then. I found so many parallels among the Jewish traditions that I thought it might be of value to share those here. Look for parallels in your own life to these ideas about the preparation time. (Taken from myjewishlearning.com)

-One prepares all week for the Sabbath
-The more observant you are of the details of Shabbat, the more you have to prepare before it arrives

-The true mark of a pious Jew is not that he or she is a shomer Shabbat (a Sabbath observer) but isshomer erev Shabbat (one who properly prepares on the eve of the Sabbath).

-One cannot shop on the Sabbath, so all of the shopping must be done on Friday
-Some Jewish men go to mikvah (a ritual bath) to cleanse themselves not only physically, but spiritually for the Sabbath.

-Many meditate and pray before the Sabbath begins.
-The entire family gathers to light candles and eat the final meal before the Sabbath begins.

May I make a few comments?

Those who are truly seeking the Kingdom of God will do so every day of the week to prepare, and they will not just be those who "go to church". We will bring with us our families, if we have helped them to prepare and they have done what is necessary to qualify for entrance into God's kingdom.

I have learned a lot from reading about the Jewish Shabbat, and the symbolism that it holds for the coming of Jesus Christ.

I know that as we prepare every day to greet the Savior, we are spending our preparation time wisely.

Writer's Block

Sadly, I've had writer's block. And the worst part about it is that I have an article due for a news agency at noon tomorrow. I've pretty much got the article written, but I have no desire to finish it. The saddest part is that I've been so excited about this article for the past week, and now, I don't even want to try to finish it. I'm hoping that if I let all of my thoughts out here on my blog, I might be able to come up with the drive to finish.

I suppose it isn't really writer's block that is inhibiting my desire. I've been helping move my family. Packing, sorting, garage sales, chasing after the kids, playing pretend with them....And I feel exhausted. I think that the greatest part about this article is that it's supposed to be about reducing stress. That has been a blessing this week, thinking about how I can reduce moving stress...or at least recognize it for what it is.

I asked a professor to help me out with the article by being interviewed and she flatly refused, saying that it would be better to talk to a specialist on campus about that topic because it wasn't her specialty.

Bah.

As if having a degree in health disqualifies you from talking about it. If you teach it in the classroom, then you are qualified enough to talk about it.

So, I won't have an interview for my article. Disappointing.

And I can't concentrate on writing this post even. My paragraphs continue to get smaller and smaller.

So, I went and looked at photos of the homes of people who are hoarders. That might make an interesting article/blog post someday.

Alright. I'm going. Time to hash out an article on stress.

Daddy

Dear Daddy-

I know that it's been two years since I last saw you. It seems like a long time. I know that we'll be together again soon...it might just take a few more years before it happens.

I miss riding in the car to work with you every morning, listening to Glenn Beck through the snowstorms, or the sunrise. Thanks for not hating me when I took those classes at 7am, which meant that you had to go to work at 6:30. Thanks for letting me use your printer to print off my papers that were due in less than an hour.....

I miss waiting for you to pick me up from work and listening to whoever the political talk show guys were that we listened to. I don't listen to them anymore because I'm not even sure what station was on.

I miss complaining about school to you and having you tell me how bad it was for you. I was kind of shocked when you told me that you got a C in one of your accounting classes. I think that you told me you failed a class once. It was silly, but it helped me get some perspective. I'll have you know that I haven't failed a class....yet....I hope you'll be proud.

I miss going to see the new, cool movies with you. I think that you would have like How to Train Your Dragon, Despicable Me and Tron. I miss you gagging at princess movies. I think you would have enjoyed Tangled.

I miss waking up early in the morning to find that you were already up and reading your scriptures. I know that you are a quiet, private kind of guy, but I'm glad that you read in the living room. Having your scriptures means so much more to me than it could have if I hadn't caught you reading.

I miss having somebody to squish my spiders. Though now I won't squish any crawling thing. I pretend that its because I don't want to kill them...but really, you were the only one who could squish spiders.

I miss having someone to eat the burned cookies and tell me that they are delicious, and then get in a fake argument with mom because she likes them uncooked. Sometimes I want to burn an entire batch of cookies just for you. You know that no one else would eat them if I did. Mom would pretend to be furious. Then I would make another double batch and undercook them. And the quadruple batch of cookies would be gone before the weekend was over.

I miss you eating your cereal out of a red, plastic cup.

I miss always having ice cream in the freezer. Not the strawberry stuff. Yuck. No one did like that kind. But I guess that's why you bought it. No one else would eat it.

I miss the smell of starch as mom ironed your shirts for work. The whole house would smell like it. I'm not sure that you knew that, because she hardly ironed while you were there.

I miss going to the temple with you. I'm glad that you took time out of your busy schedule to come do baptisms with us.

I miss you laughing.

I miss you crying.

I miss you snoring.

I miss you.

It won't be long now...I'll see you again soon.

Love from your daughter,

Anne.

P.S. Please ask Jesus when He is coming. I'm getting a little anxious.